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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Commercials Suck's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, March 26th, 2005
10:41 am
[snatchsmuggler]
I'm new here and thought I'd complain about three commercials that make me so annoyed because of their stupidity.

#1 is for Allegra. Floating about was a commercial where the pollen grains were talking. That's right, the pollen grains were mad because the woman was taking Allegra.

#2 is also on the subject of things that shouldn't speak. There is a lovely Mucinex (or something like that) commercial out where a green mucous blob (with maybe a tiny tint of yellow) is talking. Not only that but the mucous blob is wearing a hat and suspenders. I almost feel a need to back into a corner when I see this. Why the hell did they have to make it talk? Or show it in the first place?

#3 is the one commercial that sends me into juggernaut mode looking for the remote. The orange juice commercial where the woman reaches into the shelf and behind the shelf is a bright, sunny grove. There are several versions of this commercial out there, but each one is dumber than the next.

That's almost as bad as the cereal commercial where the actual cereal--boxes and all--grow on the trees.

Current Mood: contemplative
Saturday, March 19th, 2005
6:10 pm
[africanviolin]
i have a question...there are tons of commercials i hate, but for now, just this question.

there's a big lots commercial with a girl from a movie/tv show. her role in the show/movie is a frumpy dumpy type. she's not a main character. she's got longish springy brown hair and in the commerical she's got on stupid black framed glasses. the role i'm thinking of her in, she's hyper/eager to please the main character. i picture her as a "Ty"-type from Clueless (the movie, not the show), but this is definitely NOT brittany murphy. it might be ghost world or some such movie.

it's driving me nuts.


what is she from?
Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
2:40 pm
[astronauthelmet]
Sunday, December 7th, 2003
1:40 pm
[lots42]
They finally did it
There's a watch commercial out there where they say that it's not your looks, your hair, your shoes, your music, blah, blah, blah. It's your watch.

Yes, they said that the most important thing about you is what type of watch you wear.

Sigh.

Current Mood: angry
Friday, November 28th, 2003
4:52 pm
[lots42]
Best Buy Insults Themselves
I'm not sure how on-topic this is but it was funny as hell.

It's the typical Best Buy commercial where the employee has some sort of hallucinatory mind-trip with the customer.

But this one had the two GET MUGGED (subway lights go out, they come on, they've been robbed) and all their Best Buy shit stolen.

So the employee recommends web-based purchasing.

In conclusion, Best Buy is telling people not to come into the stores or you will be attacked.

Current Mood: annoyed
Sunday, November 23rd, 2003
6:22 pm
[lots42]
Cell Phuds
There's a cell phone commercial from Cingular that frosts my cookies. A mother is talking about how her house is such a mess that she can never get to her cell phone in time.

So she praises the benefit that forwards cell phone calls to your home phone.

Right. I sure do want a benefit designed for the fucking stupid.

If the house is so messed up she can't get to a cell phone in time, what about a screaming kid in time?

I know, I know, the mom is probably just an actor but still, the commercial brings up so much blatant stupidity!

If by some chance, the mom is real I hope she is investigated by the CPS

Current Mood: productive
Saturday, November 15th, 2003
4:34 pm
[lots42]
Polly
There's a commercial for Polly, which is basically mini-Barbie. Anywho, the most recent mall-playset (yes, that's right) has the singers chanting 'gotta shop, gotta shop' in an even monotone. Repetitive chanting plus unflexing tone are techniques used in brainwashing.
Saturday, October 4th, 2003
8:51 am
[lots42]
Anti-Piracy Movies
Dear anti-pirating commercials. Stop lying. Kthanks.
Sunday, September 21st, 2003
9:43 am
[taer_silveroak]
Lovely MSN Hotmail ads...
Yes. The animation of the woman that's measuring her waist is SO happy to find out that she can indeed wear a napkin holder for a belt now. Yay for her.

Current Mood: annoyed
Friday, September 19th, 2003
2:40 am
[lots42]
Various commercials I hate
1) The one where the dad teaches his kid to eat an oreo. There's this ding sound at the end that causes me physical pain.

2) The no-stain Dockers. Because of the small print that says the pants do not work as advertised.

2) 'Angel' promos. They often have no bearing to the reality of the episode in question.

3) PBS commercials AKA pledge drives.

4) Ones that show close ups of the food product from two millimeters away. Right, like the real product looks anything like that.

5) Subway commercials where that annoying bastard announcer harrases people until they eat Subway.

6) Jared. He's such a smug fuck. He got thin by exercising. Who does he think he is fooling?

7) The previews for Dickie Roberts. Show some new footage, you bastards.
Sunday, September 14th, 2003
5:07 pm
[takeit]
Bring on the commercials
Hi, I’m Danielle and I maintain the community commercials.


The name pretty much covers it, despite the vagueness. It’s basically a place for people to talk about commercials they love and hate (and also the ones that make no sense and cause you wonder why anyone would pay money to put it on TV).


So...join if you please.


Hope to see you there!


[x-posted]
Friday, September 12th, 2003
3:07 pm
[schuywriter]
AOL Broadband
I loathe this commercial because it's a pack of lies lies lies (what else is new?). This commercial begins with an ordinary suburban family having broadband connected for their computer. The "pleasant" sounding female voiceover ominously informs us that "When you get a regular broadband connection, something happens." She proceeds to tell us that by having this connection we are opening ourselves up to hackers, spammers and attacks. That's why we all need AOL for broadband -- they will protect us all from hackers, spammers etc.

They show you this family in their home and when the lady tells us they're "OPEN" the wall of their house falls down and all sorts of crap blows in all over them.

Can I just make the obvious points that:

1) If you get AOL you will still receive spam -- FROM AOL. Nothing can protect you from THEM.
2) Anyone with a brain can protect their connection WITHOUT Aol. But AOL of course doesn't want you to know this so they use these scare tactics to get you to pay lots of money for their own branded spam and garbage, making you think you're somehow "safe" with them.

How I loathe that ad. I wish it would burn in AOHell.

Current Mood: pissed off
Thursday, August 21st, 2003
2:16 pm
[etantvert]
This isn't exactly an active community here, but I thought that I'd mention a commercial that bothers me. It's for Tampax tampons. A girl dressed all in white (a great move if you're on your period, trust me) tells her boyfriend that she'll be right back, then goes upstairs to the bathroom. She sets her tampon on the windowsill. Again, that makes no sense whatsoever. She looks at herself in the mirror, then turns and finds that the wind has blown her tampon down into the bushes. The girl bites her lip in this 'Oh no, my life is now over' sort of way, then looks under the sink. She spies a box of tampons. Common sense would dictate that she'd just snag one. She can't go back to the party in her white outfit without something to stop the flow, right?

But this girl is just so crafty that she makes a chain of tampons! AND she puts a pad on the end with the sticky side out, so that she can fish for and retrieve her dropped tampon. Meanwhile the graphic shows how this particular Tampax tampon expands wider than others. Apparently it's for women who are about six inches wide down there. Finally she goes back to the party and lies to her boyfriend, telling him that there was a long line. Oh sure. He obviously thinks that she had to go number two, and he didn't want to think about that!

The point is that this brand of tampon is so freaking great that you'll go to great lengths to use it. Won't the girl who owned that box of tampons be pissed off when she finds out that about ten of them are gone? It's not like she was providing them for party favors; girls should bring their own feminine protection. Won't she be disturbed when she sees the tampon/pad chain in the wastebasket and wonder what sort of freak she invited to her party?

I don't get it, and I don't like it. It's not as bad as those douche commericials about getting that "not so fresh" feeling. It's not as bad as showing you that a pad's "four wall protection" keeps in blue liquid (because that's what menstrual fluid is, blue liquid). It's just freaky.
Monday, July 28th, 2003
8:49 pm
[taer_silveroak]
Hello!
I found this community through chiabrit and for the longest time I wondered if I was the only person that despied 99% of the commercials out there. I noticed this even more when I stopped watching so much TV and also started employment for a clipping service. I am getting sick of seeing the constant stream of human faces attempting to convey "Look! I'm happy! Buy me!". *shudder*

Nice to know I'm not alone. *sniff*

Current Mood: refreshed
Friday, January 10th, 2003
4:58 pm
[tinman]
I posted this in my own journal, but I thought I'd put it here too in the hopes that maybe we can revive this community...

Has anyone else seen the TV commercial for the Owl? It's a little combination magnifier/light that's shaped like a credit card so you can store it in your wallet. I guess it's meant to help you read stuff in tiny print or low light. They claim it's perfect for use in restaurants (to see the menu) or grocery checkout lines (to see the receipt). What kills me are the product testimonials from supposed real customers. One idiot woman claims, "None of the embarrassment of reading glasses!" Um, hello? You're embarrassed by reading glasses??? That's lame enough, but what in the hell makes you think this stupid gadget is less embarassing?? Then to top it off, they have another dork saying, "No more laughing at my poor eyesight!" Yeah, trust me, buddy, you whip that thing out in front of me and there will definitely be laughing. You hold up the grocery checkout with it and there will be yelling.
Thursday, June 27th, 2002
10:58 pm
[aronp]
Ugh. OK, who is the marketing genius that thought reviving ALF was a good idea? Emmitt Smith is a Hall of Famer about to break the most hallowed non-baseball record in American professional sports, and this is the best endorsement deal he can get?
Saturday, June 8th, 2002
6:01 pm
[kitchen_floor87]
evian...
okay, i HATE the new evian water commecial.
its like "evian is pure and clean, like a baby" and then it has babies is water...
when i think of babies, i think about vomit, i think about diarrhea, not clean and pure stuff...

and i hate their ads in magazines where people are drinking evian water out of glass bottles when you cant even GET evian in glass bottles!
Monday, June 3rd, 2002
5:17 pm
[aronp]
AOL rant
OK, I have had enough after seeing the commericals half a billion times over the weekend(All Ted Turner channels are basically just AOL infomercials now). Those people just seem way too happy. "You've got mail." "Who is that guy?" Oh, shut up.
Tuesday, May 28th, 2002
7:00 pm
[etantvert]
The new McDonalds' commercials. It runs through the various desserts that you can get there each day of the week. It's a rap done by either a woman or a high-voiced guy, extremely annoying. Apple pie Monday, triple thick milkshake Tuesday, sundae Wednesday, et cetera. Mostly I remember the yogurt parfait on Friday, 'cause "I wanted somethin' light". Sure, the yogurt parfait on Friday will cancel out the junk that you ate the rest of the week.

Current Mood: aggravated
Tuesday, May 14th, 2002
6:24 pm
[chuckr]
Two minor nits...
First, I question any product named "Nads".

Second, there's an ITT commercial featuring "testimonials"...one guy says that he works for a "technology-based networking company." The more I think about that phrase, the more it irritates me.

That is all.
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